It just occurred to me how happy I am not to be a billionaire, not to be famous, not to be the head of a giant company, or any of it.

I look at Elon Musk in interviews and I think: this guy isn’t happy. He’s a genius and he’s a great leader/businessman, but he isn’t happy. At all.

He’s driven. Almost psychotically so.

I think in our culture we idolize this kind of thing.

I believe it has to do with such an incredible imbalance in humanity’s willingness to live up to their true potential. You get billions of people hiding away their brilliance, shutting down, disconnecting from their creativity – and so the result is that pressure to create, innovate, expand and move forward gets flushed and channeled into a few individuals. So you get an Elon Musk, a Steve Jobs.

But it takes a toll on those people. And they aren’t the kind of people I’d like to be friends with.

Money is energy. Anyone who thinks that is “foo foo” has never made any. When I jumped from being broke to making $60K to six figures… it fucked with my entire being. It was like a fire hose that had been just leaking water was getting stronger and stronger.

So the amount of energy required to handle a million dollars is intense. And to handle a Billion? You’re talking about a completely different kind of human experience. Maybe that is why we do idolize these guys – because they are on such a different energetic plane than we are.

You know how nearly every Lottery winner usually blows their money? That’s why. It’s a thing.

Elon and Jeff are innovators at least. They are billionaires with an Edge, always pushing forward. I can admire them and be grateful for their contribution but also wary.

You’ve also got Oil Billionaires and Old Money – people who don’t contribute anything and are just hoarding a nuclear amount of money energy, and that’s also a shitty vibe.

But the point is – it’s a lot of fucking work not only to make that kind of money, but to live with it. When I listen to Elon Musk I hear something I’ve heard from other wealthy people: he can’t take a vacation.

I didn’t say he “doesn’t” take a vacation. He CAN’T. He cannot stop the energy or his mind long enough to just enjoy life and doing nothing even for a short amount of time. He actually hates vacations.

The only Multi Millionare I knew personally was the same way. He had over $50 Million in the bank, at least, and couldn’t stop working. I’ll write more about him later. He was a wonderfully nice man, but his energy was so intense from all this money that it made him very difficult to be around.

I like what’s happening in the world today because the more people speak up and begin to express and create and claim their power the more things will equalize. Wealth inequality has a lot to do with systemic issues and people in power hoarding it like the oil billionaires. But it also has to do with humanity’s general unwillingness to change, move forward, and our collective destruction and denial of our own creativity.

I’m such a fierce advocate of information products and micro businesses because I think it’s much healtheir to inspire everybody to create their own business as a self expression with a goal of making $70K a year versus having everyone compete over trying to be the next Elon Musk multi billionaire. Or creating a world where a few genius nutballs command all the ideas and vision and cash and everyone else is just checking their instagram worrying about rent.

Another thing I don’t like about Musk is his insistence that we need to populate Mars. I think he’s fucking nuts. This Planet isn’t dead or gone yet, we should be focusing our resources on fixing up the place we currently live rather than trying to struggle into the heartless cold vacuum of space. To me his vision for Mars speaks to the same kind of imbalance I’ve been talking about.

I would love to see humans go back to the moon and get to Mars, as an act of exploration. Not of abandoning Earth, our home.

To me being a billionaire is like the financial equivalent of going to Mars. It’s so far out of reality for most people and ultimately so inhospitable of an experience energetically.

Realizing that makes me feel even more grateful for both how much and how little I have. I once wanted fame and that kind of money and it was borne from an inner feeling of insecurity and lack. Now that I am more grounded in myself I feel a lot more gratitude for the riches I do have and almost none of that drive.

I have one thing Elon Musk doesn’t: The ability to enjoy doing nothing and relaxing. I would not trade that for a billion dollars.